Howdy folks, today we are going to interview the main character from the book “Constellation Crimes” because his story is as crazy as they come!

Jared we hear you have a new book out and it’s all about you. Would you like to tell us about it?

That’s right. It all started with an eerie red glow – actually it was a red meteor that was crash landing in the woods near my father’s hunting lodge.

A meteor? Was it big? Did it cause damage?

Well to be honest I never found it. We saw it land. We saw this huge red glow completely light up the woods for a moment but I never found actual proof its landing. The odd thing we found was the fact that the town’s new red-haired substitute teacher just seemed to appear on my father’s front porch and I don’t think anyone saw the car she claimed broke down.

That is odd. Can you tell us what happened next?

I’ll do better than that, I’ll show you!

Are those zits on your face?

They are! I never had acne before and these red dots just show up. Then my friends who have boogers for brains get this crazy idea to connect the dots on my face, and we discover that my zits make the shape of a constellation.

A constellation? The stars that make shapes in the sky that ancient travelers used to make up stories and myths about?

That’s right. And if that wasn’t cooky enough, after reading about the constellation myth, we started realizing the events were truly happening. A crab actually attacked us. A giant scorpion nearly killed Samuel and a run-away ATV nearly ran over Jake!

Holy cow! Was everyone alright?

Yeah, we were fine. But when the neighbors chickens started dying and that actor was nearly taken out, we started to realize that the substitute teacher had to have something to do with all of this.

Wow! That’s out of this world. Well Jared, I think we need to stop there. We don’t want to give away too much about this story of yours.

You’re right. So everyone reading – if you want to know what happened and how we found out the teacher was from Mars, you’ll have to read the book.


Whoops – spoiler alert.

To read this action packed, boys-will-be-boys, adventure by author Kathleen J. Shields please visit her website at:

Constellation Crimes by author Kathleen J. Shields

Constellation Crimes by author Kathleen J. Shields