Your imagination may resolve a fight but you may forget to tell the other party.

That is what my horoscope said the other day. It didn’t necessarily correspond to the situations of that day, but it is SO me!

When I was younger, whenever someone upset me, whenever my mom told me to do something I didn’t want to do, whenever things weren’t going right; instead of saying something aloud to them to express what I was feeling (which only would have gotten me in trouble (or more trouble) or started a fight I wasn’t prepared to have) I talked to them in my head.

Alright – no judgments about me – yet!

Sometimes I went into my room and quietly had that conversation I was too afraid to have in person. I’d repeat what they said and then come up with a rebuttal. Then they’d respond and I’d respond back.  Maybe I’m psycho – or maybe I was being smart.  Let’s think about it.

I didn’t get in trouble for talking back.  I didn’t get into fights I wasn’t prepared to have – and better than all of that – whether it took me a few minutes or a few hours to come up with that sassy come back I wanted to say but couldn’t think of fast enough… In my head; I used that comeback immediately and felt good about it. Or, sometimes, that comeback caused the other (me) to retaliate, getting angry.  That made me realize how lucky I was I hadn’t figured it out what to say and reacted to what I was feeling.

Maybe that makes me a scaredy cat.

And maybe…

That’s the reason I write such great conversations.  Conversations that flow so seamlessly it was as if you were listening to them right at that moment. And what is great about those conversations is: When you read them – you don’t know if it took me hours or even days for that comeback – it’s a seamless conversation to you!

So when my horoscope said “Your imagination may resolve a fight, but you may forget to tell the other party.” It so totally was talking about me to a T. Because I can’t even begin to count how many fights I resolved and had; in the safety of my mind; that saved me tons of turmoil from friends, family and bullies throughout my life.

Maybe more of us should talk to ourselves.

It kind of goes along with that old phrase: “Think before you speak.”

4 Comments

  1. Anonymous's Gravatar Anonymous
    October 18, 2013    

    Kathleen, I use that kind of problem solving also. Your conclusions are so “right on”: You are a blessing. I will tell you, when we can get together for a talk, about the sweet phone calls I received this summer from one of the two girls who lived with us for 6 1/2 yrs.

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